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I Love It When I Don’t Listen to Myself

I used to have a problem with listening to people. I’d be so intent on getting out whatever I felt it was so crucial to impart that I’d have some trouble focusing on, well, whoever else was there. Now I listen carefully to other people — and not so much to myself. I can’t tell you the number of times I hear about something supposedly great that I said and I literally have no recollection of it.

On that note, I stumbled across this very cool review from my new favorite person, The Unprofessional Critic, who was blogging about books about the workplace and said these kind words about our school text:

5. Bought: While at the Printer’s Row Book Fair last month, I attended a Q&A with Jen Lancaster and Bought author Anna David. The latter was a former L.A. celebrity journalist who started writing fiction because many of her colleagues were getting published and “if that bitch could write a book, so could I!” (She also referred to one of her prospective literary agents as a “douchebag.” I developed a girl-crush then and there.) Bought, Ms. David’s second novel, chronicles the journey of struggling freelance reporter Emma Swanson, who has learned the hard way that covering Hollywood parties is a lot less fun than attending them. When Emma meets Jessica, a professional escort–who offers more of a girlfriend experience than a straight-up sexual transaction, and accepts gifts and rent payments more than she does cold, hard cash–she is intrigued as to why an increasing number of women are voluntarily choosing and even celebrating this occupation. Jessica readily agrees to be the main subject for a story that could catapult Emma’s fledgling writing career to new heights. As she and Jessica spend more time together, Emma gains confidence and is offered an amazing career opportunity. However, Emma soon learns that in Jessica’s world, nothing is as easy or free as it appears. David’s writing is both breezy and thought-provoking, giving new insights into life, love and work in the land of Hollyweird.

First of all, that’s a better summary than I give. And secondly, I love that I’m calling people douchebags and bitches while a mic is in front of me and not even really remembering. This doesn’t mean, of course, that all you teachers have license to use foul language in class. I’m still consoling those students who were disturbed by Professor ToddRod’s lecture on the sexuality of salty crackers covered in chocolate peanut butter!

11 Responses to I Love It When I Don’t Listen to Myself

  1. DM DM says:

    Does that mean we’ll have to cancel our performance of the updated gangster version of Grease where Rizzo keeps saying of Sandy, “I’m gonna plant a cap in that bitch’s ass!”

  2. anthony0358 anthony0358 says:

    I love that!
    Oh and I saw the video segment of “In Your Pants” on AOTS last night
    Great advice
    In a matter of moments Anna David calmly explained :
    1-Sex in a public place is a serious crime
    2-Annual Checkups for STDs is a must
    3-I now know the 100% meaning of “GFE”

  3. FupDuckTV says:

    Good use of the words ‘Bitch’ and ‘Douchebag’.

  4. Mike Mike says:

    You two had that crowd eating out of your hands.
    I thought the use of both words was timely and appropriate. Douchbag has been used in many forms around here, some that were made up, some legitimate and used in hashtags.

    I try not to use such language on here, just in case the faculties children happen to surf the net in the Chi_Mike Day Care Center(Joe got to name a building). Of course most of them are under 5, but we grow them smart at ADA.

    I’m also deeply disturbed by several things ToddRod says, I’m going to need extensive therapy. Maybe you can practice the whole listening thing while I get some couch time?

    And lastly, about the whole new favorite person thing(who isn’t a student at ADA by the way). We have some fragile ego’s around here, and with such heated competition for favorite student/teachers pet/king suckup going on, do we really have to throw another horse into the race? It’s tough enough competing against spa gift givers (awesome), video makers (damn creative that one), bought readers (can’t go wrong), peanut butter senders (that was a good one) and just general ass kissers already. I’m laying awake at night trying to come up with new and interesting ways to keep our dear pricipal happy as it is.

    Hope you had fun rollerblading, if you fall down and scrape a knee or something, I have bandages and some no sting antiseptic spray at the ready.

    Mike

    #iwillalwayshavemysignedcopyofboughtandwonttell

  5. Skunkcontrol Skunkcontrol says:

    The reluctance to put away childish things may be a requirement of genius. ~Rebecca Pepper Sinkler

  6. toddrod toddrod says:

    Did Mike say that he needed some “couch time?” I’ll give you some couch time Mike! Just call me! I’ll bring some salty crackers with peanut butter… and some hot coco! Wooooo!

  7. Joe McD Joe McD says:

    Words like bitch and douchebag don’t shock people anymore. They used to until “artists” started using that kind of language to sound edgy and hip and cool. And so you get comics (no names here) whose entire comedy routine is one string of obscenities after another. And it’s great because how much talent do you really need to write, “I was walking down the street and this guy says to me %([92)&#(@)&” And critics marvel and say, “Wow – how edgy, how ground breaking!!”

    So then everyone starts using language like that to the point where there’s no more shock value. Which is fine unless you have young kids and one day 3 year old Johnny calls Aunt Bertha the C word – and then wonders why his parents are getting so upset because the last time he heard someone say that everyone thought it was funny.

  8. ErinLindsey says:

    I do the same thing. I always try to hear other people and I constantly forget to listen to myself. Still, I’m pretty sure you are in fact brilliant, and you should definitely listen to yourself more.

    I usually reserve the profanity for moments of anger or frustration. I used to have a mouth like a trucker and it was a hard habit to break. But sometimes, someone really is just a bitch or a douche. Call a duck a duck.

  9. Skunkcontrol Skunkcontrol says:

    The most beautiful view is the one I share with you. ~Author Unknown

  10. toddrod toddrod says:

    That dude’s a douchebag,
    And his wife’s an old hag.
    They probably live in a ditch.
    Am I being a total bitch?

    Should I explore this remorse?
    Or should I just stay the course?
    It’s so easy to be cruel.
    I don’t wanna be a naive fool.

    My mother used to say,
    “Be nice when you play.”
    But many others aren’t so nice.
    So, is that just lame advice?

    But here at the Anna David Academy,
    Nice is what we all want to be!
    Patient, heart warming, and cool
    Kindness isn’t the character of a fool.

  11. Skunkcontrol Skunkcontrol says:

    Where we love is home,
    Home that our feet may leave, but not our hearts.
    ~Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr

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